"There was a young boy, named Luke Smurfwalker, who worked on a condenser farm. But one day, many things changed for the young boy. It all started when he was asked to clean up a pair of new smurfoids that his father had recently purchased.
"Young Luke Smurfwalker got the impression that these smurfoids were stolen, based on a message that he had seen stored in one of the smurfoids memosmurfory. It was from a young princess, Princess Leismurf. She was under attack by the evil Smurfpire, and her ship was under attack from Smurf Vader. The smurfiest smurf in the entire smurfalaxy.
"Luke, intent on become a fighter pilot, and wanting to get off the dung heap of a planet, Tantosmurf, that he lived on. Decided he would confront his father. He wanted action in his life. Action is what he got.
"One of the smurfoids had escaped, and Luke Smurfwalker had to go smurf it down. He took the other smurfoid, C3-PSmurf, and decided to find the little missing smurfoid, R2-Smurf2.
"After finding the little smurfoid, young Smurfwalker started leading him back to his smurfy speeder, when he was attacked by some Tusmurf Raiders. Injured, it looked like young Smurfwalker was in trouble.
"Fortunately for Luke, Obi-Wan Smurfobi was watching, and scared away the Tusmurf Raiders, and saved Smurfwalker.
"Obi-Wan Smurfobi took Smurfwakler to his home, and gave him some smurfaid. After Luke was coherent again, Smurfobi told Smurfwalker a story that was quite perplexing to the young lad, he told him, about his father, and gave young Smurfwalker his father's old smurfsaber. A weapon used by the Smurfi Knights.
"Obi-Wan also saw the message on R2-Smurf2, and asked Luke to join him, as he went to rescue the young princess Leismurf. Luke was hesitant to go ...
"Obi-Wan Smurfobi took Luke back to his parents home, only to find it destroyed, by Smurfperial Smurf Troopers. Luke was devastated, and realizing he had nothing left for himself on Tantosmurf. He decided to head out and help Obi-Wan Smurfobi, in his quest to rescue the princess, and join the smurfebels in destroying the Smurfpire.
"Obi-Wan Smurfobi takes young Smurfwalker to Mos Smurfsi, the 'Biggest poor of wretched smurfscum, this side of the smurfalaxy.' In the big city, they look for transportation to Smurfalderan, the home planet of Princess Leismurf, and her father, a friend of Obi-Wan Smurfobi.
"The pair barely made if off of Mos Smurfsi, as they had been searched out by Smurftroopers, who knew that one of the smurfoids may have had critical information. Thankfully, the smurfy band had hired Han Smurfolo and Smurfbacca to pilot them, aboard their ship the Smurfenium Falcon.
"After blasting out of Mos Smurfsi, Han Smurfsolo had to do a bit of Smurfy Flying in an effort to avoid Smurfperial Destroyers orbiting Tantosmurf. Lucky they made the jump to smurfspeed, and were on their way to Smurfalderan.
"Upon reaching Smurfalderan, they found to their horror that it was not there! Smurfalderan had been destroyed! But by what, what in the world had such firepower? The Smurfperials new secret weapon, the Death Smurf.
"Unable to escape from the grip of the Death Smurfs Tractor beams, the Smurfenium Falcon was sucked into one of the hangers aboard the Death Smurf.
"Once aboard, Han Smurfolo hid the rag tag group in secret smurfpartments aboard the ship. Han Smurfolo was actually not a smurfy guy. He was actually a Smurfuggler!
"Interested in only the reward for rescuing the princess, Han Smurfolo, Smurfbacca, Smurfwalker, Obi-Wan Smurfobi, and the smurfoids hatch a bold scheme to rescue Princess Leismurf.
"In a miraculous plot that did not incorporate any of Papa Smurfs magic potions, the group was somehow able to rescue the princess, turn off the Tractor beams, and escape with the secret plans, still inside R2-Smurf2's memory.
"After leaving the Death Smurf, the group returned Princess Leismurf to the Rebels, and offered the group a large reward (with which Han Smurfolo was very happy with). However, there was a problem.
Unable to open "There.col imperials now knew where the Smurfebel's secret base was, and they had sent the Death Smurf to destroy the Smurfebel's secret base.
"Outnumbered, outgunned, and lookin' like they were gonna get a smurf-ass woopin', the Smurfebels made a valiant stand against the attacking Smurfperial forces. Unfortunately, Han Smurfolo was not convinced by princess Leismurf to stay and join the fight. He was only interested in the money.
"Desperately, battle ensued. Bravely, the Smurfebels attacked with the little resources that they had, intent on breaking through the defences of the Death Smurf, using the information that was so preciously stored within R2-Smurf2.
"The Smurfebels tried, and tried, and in one valiant last attempt, young Smurfwalker flew his Smurf-Wing fighter down the corridor, and over the smurfalation shaft, in an attempt to fire a smurfton torpedo into it, and destroy the Death Smurfs powercore.
"But evil Lord Darth Smurf was on young Smurfwalkers tail, and was about to shoot him down, when all of a sudden, out of the blue [Actually Black, they were in space — Pete Love] the Smurfenium Falcon swooped down, and shot at Darth Smurf's fighter, sending it into a smurfy little spin. 'You're all clear kid, now let's Smurf this thing and go home!' Yelled Han Smurfolo over the radio as young Smurfwalker fired his smurfton torpedo into the smurfulation shaft, destroying the Death Smurf.
"Upon returning to the rebel base, everyone was ecstatic, over Luke's incredible flying, the destruction of the Death Smurf, and over Han Smurfolo's noble return at the last moment to save the Smurfebels, and young Smurfwalker.
"I hope all you Smurfs enjoyed my story?" Asked Papa smurf, but alas, all the smurfs had run away, fearing that Jar-Jar Smurf may have entered the story at some point. No one like's Jar-Jar Smurf.
Pete Smurfzak